Well, it’s nice to finally have landed softly in the bustling city of Hangzhou . I probably should apologize for not posting anything for a good month now, but traveling is one reason I am here in China . I can’t do both. Thanks for being patient. I know, I know, I know, I owe a ton of you E-mails. Now that I am moved in to Hangzhou and have a teaching routine, I promise I will slowly but surely get to all of that mail. So, before I forget everything let me give you some brief descriptions of my travels.

Anhui

I spent a bulk of the last month in Anhui . The only reason that anyone goes to Anhui is to see Huang Shan ( Yellow Mountain ), or because they want to see what nuclear winter will look like. I had a wonderful time visiting Anhui because I was with my good friend, Liang Bing, and his family in the little town of Wuhe . But if you don’t know anybody in Anhui and you aren’t headed straight to Huang Shan and straight back home, I fear for you. Most of the small villages I rode through in Anhui (and I many on my way to Bengbu and Hefei and a few other cities) have tons of papers and trash piled up around the village. 

I did get to see the inner workings of Small Town China up close which was educational and enlightening. Along the way, I also discovered that I have a sick urge to kick chickens. Let me explain. Each day during my three week stay in Anhui , we would go visit Liang Bing’s family on the outskirts of town. They had several fat chickens running around. The chickens provided a two fold nutrional purpose—eggs and meat. But we ate a lot more meat than eggs; let’s just say I wasn’t stepping in as much chicken crap at the end of my stay as the beginning.

Anyway, if you are staying in a place that resembles post WWW III, it's can be difficult to entertain yourself. So I started looking at the chickens as a source of entertainment. These chickens are fat and almost perfectly round—like a big fluffy soccer ball. Also chickens have two skinny built-in little tees, which makes launching them with your feet much easier.

Each day I would show up to the Liang's house, smile, say the right things, and fend off baijiu attacks from all sides. However, the entire time I was really deep in contemplation about those chickens. The Liangs have a ten foot wall around their house/commune. I felt quite sure given the right weather conditions, soccer shoes, and chicken shape I could clear the wall with no problem.

But still I fought it this urge off. Sometimes, I would be hanging out outside alone watching the ozone overhead melt and the trash blow by; it would be just me and the chickens (by now they trusted me), and the urge would get almost overpowering. Once I even sized up a chicken, paced off three steps straight back and two over--John Kasey style--and took a deep breath; only to have Liang Bing’s mother come outside to call me in for another twelve course meal.

On my last day in Anhui , I asked Liang if his family would be offended if I kicked one of their chickens over their wall and then ran around like I had won the Superbowl. He said yes, so I dropped the subject, and we are still friends.

This past week in Hangzhou , I have seen some chickens that don’t look like they have a lot going for them clucking around in front of restaurants near this school. I’m waiting, biding my time. It’s gunna happen. One of the teachers here at the school, Russell, wants to have a chicken kickin’ intervention for me. He thinks it’s just plain wrong. Meanwhile, some of the other teachers have told me in confidence, that if I really need to kick a chicken (and I really do) they can make happen. I understand that some may construe this as a cruelty to animals. But if I were a chicken (a really overweight yellow one with skinny legs and thick feathers) it’s how I would want to go. Also, I understand it’s not like the eighties when people could go around kicking chickens all the time with no thought of Bird Flu or a lawsuit, so I’ll be picking my chickens carefully. (In a day or two I will have quick reviews of Nanjing , Suzhou and Shanghai that will be as equally informative)